Thursday 26 March 2009

The deed is done

So....about a month ago, my lovely Head of Faculty got a job at a new school for September, leaving her post 'up for grabs'. I'm the second in charge, so I think most people thought I would jump at the chance to apply for the job. How wrong they were. I just don't want it. It was what I did in my old school and it's almost as though 'I've been there and have got the T-shirt' so to speak. A small part of me can see all the reasons why I should apply, but it's like my heart is saying 'no' and my head is saying 'yes'.

The closing date for applications is tomorrow. As of last Friday, there had been two enquiries and no applications. I took an application, 'just incase', but haven't had any inclination whatsoever to fill it out.

That said, I have just spent an hour writing a letter of application. I really can't be bothered to fill out the whole application and so have written this half-hearted letter instead. I know why I'm doing it. For the other members of the Faculty who want me to apply, for the school and for the students. I guess that's the thing with teaching. Very little of it is actually done for yourself.

If I get it, my heart will be in 100%, I've no doubt about that, but I'm just so confused with it all (that's why I'm now rambling!)

So - I guess time will tell is all I can say. Oh to have a crystal ball ah?

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